Picking on legal writing by a professor
Written by a law professor:
Abstraction. Some abstraction is necessary in law and in all writing. But keep it to a minimum. This paragraph needs more concreteness for the reader's mind to grasp. Some particularly abstract phrases:
Variation. Consider these 2 sentences and the italicized phrases:
Defining. This is the first paragraph of a law-review article. It uses the initial-caps term "Bounded Adaptation." But the author does not define it, before or after its use.
Agreement. In the clause "This articulation and confirmation is essential" we have a dual or compound subject, so shouldn't we have a plural verb: "articulation and confirmation are essential"? I guess the author is treating "articulation and confirmation" as a single unit.
We can do better.
Wayne Schiess
Director of Legal Writing | The University of Texas School of Law | Website | Seminars | Articles | Books: Preparing Legal Documents Nonlawyers Can Read and Understand
| Better Legal Writing
| Writing for the Legal Audience
| The Legal Memo: A Basic Guide
Law is a process of Bounded Adaptation. The law that exists at any given moment is constantly driven to adapt to changing circumstances within the framework of what has gone before. The boundaries of that framework are policed by the necessity of articulating an interpretation in a way that gains general acceptance. It is the need to effectively articulate a common logic that mitigates the distortion of personal perspective. This articulation and confirmation is essential in a system that claims allegiance to precedent, and it reinforces our ability to serve that allegiance. This process of Bounded Adaptation cannot proceed effectively without an adequately structured dialogue that will promote the flow of information and analysis. Expounding a common logic and testing it through the various spheres of acceptance requires a medium of communication that allows a meaningful exchange.This text has a few problems, which I discuss below.
Abstraction. Some abstraction is necessary in law and in all writing. But keep it to a minimum. This paragraph needs more concreteness for the reader's mind to grasp. Some particularly abstract phrases:
- policed by the necessity of articulating an interpretation
- mitigates the distortion of personal perspective
- various spheres of acceptance
Variation. Consider these 2 sentences and the italicized phrases:
- The boundaries of that
framework are policed by the necessity of articulating an
interpretation in a way that gains general acceptance.
- It is the need to effectively articulate a common logic that mitigates the distortion of personal perspective.
Defining. This is the first paragraph of a law-review article. It uses the initial-caps term "Bounded Adaptation." But the author does not define it, before or after its use.
Agreement. In the clause "This articulation and confirmation is essential" we have a dual or compound subject, so shouldn't we have a plural verb: "articulation and confirmation are essential"? I guess the author is treating "articulation and confirmation" as a single unit.
We can do better.
Director of Legal Writing | The University of Texas School of Law | Website | Seminars | Articles | Books: Preparing Legal Documents Nonlawyers Can Read and Understand


The nature of the writing in the professor's opening paragraph is why I (and perhaps other lawyers) don't read law reviews. I am very interested in the idea of how law adapts to cultural and economic changes. But this kind of diction and syntax requires so much work of the reader that whatever reward awaits doesn't seem worth the effort.
Wayne says:
You're dead on.
Reply to this